January Pointless Lists

Wow, the end of January.  You know what this means?  I've been 39 for 6 months.  So clearly, I have 6 months to go until I'm 40.  Bloody hell!  That was math I did right there, did you notice?  Oh, and almost being 40 is pretty shocking too.

Well, whatever.  Plenty of time left before my probable breakdown.

Here's the sort of month we had: Eric and I took a walk mid-January and it was so warm I took my jacket off.  Then like a week later we had ice and 2 feet of snow and we couldn't even get out of the driveway.  January is bi-polar.  Apparently.

Abby's basketball games started this month.  Johanna got pink eye.  Eric is fighting one mother of a cold at the moment.  And I'm spending way too much time playing The Sims.  (My people!  They need me!)

The end.  List time!

Books read:
The Land of Later On by Anthony Weller.  This one was featured in the Kindle Daily Post, and it got a lot of 5 star reviews.  So I thought, why not?  Eric used to give me flowers on the girls' birthdays.  Now he gives me an ebook.  (Yay!)  I chose this one.  And you know, it was good.  The storyline was interesting--what lies beyond this life?--and it developed at a decent pace.  Most of the time.  Sometimes I was like, um, can we get to the point here?  And the ending felt a bit rushed, but whatever, I guess.  I can forgive that because Walt Whitman!  Is a character!  But 5 stars?  That's pushing it a little.  I'd say more like 3, just because the writing was a bit... unpolished, I guess.  Like we're one draft away from the finished product.  And look, big words don't really add anything to a story, Anthony Weller.  I don't need to be knocked in the head with your vocabulary, okay?  Because no one talks like that.

Um... I lost my train of thought there for a second.  Great storyline, kind of missed the boat in the execution, but still worth reading.

Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs.  I really enjoyed this story.  So I was a little shocked after the fact when I went back and read some reviews and saw all the 1 and 2 stars going on.  What?  I loved the writing style, and I loved the old, creepy pictures (that did not translate well on the Kindle, but that's okay because I just looked at them later on my poser iPad).  The ending might be a "to be continued" sort of deal... or maybe that's just how it ends.  I'm okay with unsettled endings.  My brain can end it, yo!  I don't need it spelled out for me.  So I'd give it a 4, because 5 is perfection (looking at you, Night Circus) and it wasn't quite that.  But I definitely recommend this one.  It was most entertaining.  P.S. Eric has decided he gave me THIS one instead of the one above.  Well, why not?  It's all the same pot anyway.

Farewell: The Greatest Spy Story of the Twentieth Century by Eric Raynauld, Sergei Kostin and Richard V. Allen; translated by Catherine Cauvin-Higgins.  I'm not really sure what to tell you about this one.  I bought it probably two months ago when Amazon had it on sale for $1.99 because the reviews made it sound interesting.  And it's a true story!

So anyway, here's what I learned: This Farewell / Vetrov guy--a Russian mole who essentially gave the west enough info to eventually bring down the USSR--was sort of nuts.  Well, I guess you'd have to be to put yourself into that sort of a situation.  FYI, this thing is translated, so sometimes?  Dry.  And it's not like Vetrov is likable or anything.  The guy is a jerk.  Thus, it took me practically all month to wade through it.  Maybe three stars, then.  Because it was interesting.  But just okay as a story.

Movies watched:
Rio.  And you know what?  It was darling.

The Last Airbender.  With Johanna, because she wanted to see the live-action version after watching the cartoons 50 times each.  Um, wow.  Talk about bad acting.  Which made it AWESOME.  And Sokka?  Is Jasper from Twilight!  Ah, that explains so much.

Things my kids actually fought about:
Over whether or not you need shots to enter a foreign country.  Abby says that to go to Japan, you need shots.  Johanna was horrified and rather unconvinced, so there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth--on both sides.  So apparently Japan is out, but Canada is in, and possibly Mexico, although Abby is still looking into that one.

And whether or not Abby needs to go to Manners Class.  Johanna says yes.  Abby says no.  You can imagine what happened next.

Things we learned:
Johanna--that when Daddy says, "Go straight into the shower," he does not actually mean to go in fully clothed.

Abby--sometimes girls who play basketball have big brothers, giving "rough housing" a whole new meaning.  (Dude!  There are some scary middle school girls out there.)

Eric--just when you think winter isn't coming, you end up with a lot of ice-ladden limb in your yard.

Trisha--homemade cleaners?  Are awesome.  I'll have to write about that whole ordeal sometime.  Totally changed my life.

Things I do not want to hear again, ever:
"Mom!  Madie just projectile vomited!" --Abby

We've done this before

They say that when you start talking about the weather, it's because you don't have anything left to say.  But I'm totally going to talk about the weather, and I have all kinds of things to say.  Well, for one thing, that's all any of us are talking about, because it's been a heck of a week.  And for another, I'll do what I want!  (Um, to quote Abby.  She says that all the time.  And yes, it does get old!  Twelve-year-olds are a lot like three-year-olds, if you want to know the truth.)

So.  Here's what we were looking at two days ago:

Snow.  Joy.

And here's the same shot today:

Sunshine!  Joy!

Please note that all the snow on the deck?  HAS MELTED!  And you can actually see the road!  That's a beautiful sight right there.  It's sort of weird to drive at a normal rate of speed again.  I've been in second gear pretty much non-stop since last Tuesday.  And just FYI, not everyone appreciates it when you go 20 miles an hour, even when it's icy out.  Some people just suck.  There's nothing I can do about that, so we'll move on.

The shoe Johanna lost out by the play structure?  Yeah, still lost.  But after that little ordeal, Eric got her a new pair of shoes AND a new pair of boots, so problem solved.  That shoe was on its last legs anyway.  Johanna is not really the sort of kid who is easy on her shoes.  Or anything, really.  We are in acceptance.  It's not a big deal.

Anyway, the truly great thing about all of this melting action is that I can get out of the house now.  Oh, sure, there are days when I don't leave the house (and now that I'm working, those days are few and far between.  And awesome), but that's because it's my choice.  When you can't leave because you can't even get out of your driveway, that's a problem.  A mentally exhausting, emotionally draining problem.  Just let me out, yo.  I'm not cut out for Antarctic living.  Or Arctic living.  Anything with an "-rctic," really, isn't for me.  That letter combination is just messy.

And yes, it's only January, so I'm aware we probably have more winter coming.  I'm trying to be tough, but wow.  I'd be okay with an early spring, if anyone is taking votes on that sort of thing.

Oh, by the way, thanks to modern medicine, Johanna's eyes are looking MUCH better.  As in, you can't even tell anything is wrong with her at all.  She is thrilled to be back at school.  I am thrilled to have four hours of uninterrupted quiet time before I go to work.  Win-win!

Tori Amos, Goodbye Pisces.  Well, because that's what just shuffled up.  Abby doesn't like Tori at all, which makes me wonder about that kid.  "I cried and I washed my tears / that turned into diamond / ice into ice and if it could freeze / my heart wouldn't float away."  Sometimes I think Tori needs a hug.  Anyway, there you go.

Make up your own ending

The most beautiful words, ever, uttered this morning by the news guy on the radio: "School is on time."  Hooray!  There's nothing like being with your children for five straight days to make you appreciate the wonder that is the public education system.

Except!

Johanna has pink eye.  I was hoping that her eye was just irritated when I noticed it Saturday evening.  But then yesterday it wasn't any better.  And this morning it's definitely worse.

Abby says it looks like Jo got into a fight...

Good times!  You know what, though?  Abby had pink eye so often when she was in that 4-7 age range that it's no longer that big of a deal.  It's like, oh, pink eye.  Huh.  It's very boring, really.

Anyway, as we were taking Abby to school (one out of two ain't bad), Johanna started making a list of everything that's wrong with her.  She was being mock-dramatic.  It was awesome.  Here's what she came up with:

1. She has pink eye
2. Her eyes itch
3. She has a tickle in her throat
4. She has gunk in her eye
5. Her ears are getting louder
6. Her eyebrows are getting skinnier
7. She has a stuffy nose
8. She has gunk on her eyelashes
9. She *almost* lost her voice
10. She doesn't even know what Russian is
11. She's sneezing
12. One hand is yellowy-pinkish-red, and the other one is pinkish-red
13. Her belly button hurts
14. There's something on her nose
15. Her tongue itches
16. It's hard for her to break the ice in the freezer!

The exclamation point there was her idea.  And perhaps she's having a little too much fun coming up with ailments.  (Does this remind anyone else of that Shel Silverstein poem?)  

Now she's feeling better, though, and is making herself an iced coffee.  (Um, yes.  My 7-year-old is a coffee connoisseur.  It's decaf, though, so that makes it better.  Right?)  We have a doctor's appointment later this morning--I tried to work the "my kid has pink eye and am hoping to get a prescription" angle, but apparently they need to see her first.  Ah, well.

Um, so that's it, I guess.  Wait, wanna see what the yard looks like?  It snowed all day yesterday, but today it's just cold, foggy, and slick.  I actually almost bit it trying to take this picture:

Our yard looks thrashed, thanks to
that ice storm.

I'm so over winter.

Puddle of Mud, Blurry.  Because everything IS so messed up.  And "blurry" references sight and... oh, never mind.