Taking a stand

With the May Primaries coming up, and all the commercials and canned calls and lawn signs that go with it, I feel like June can't come fast enough... and we still have two weeks to go.

And then another seven months before November rolls around and all this nonsense is over.

I just depressed myself. Hang on while I get more coffee...

That's better.

Hey, though, in this post-Florida climate where every vote is important, I thought I'd just cut to the chase and let those relentlessly fighting over me know exactly where I stand on the issues. This will make it so much easier on everybody. If what you're selling isn't on this list, don't call me. I'll call you. Probably on accident. I do a lot of butt dialing. Just ask Ann.

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I believe that a woman should be able to nap without her motives being questioned.

I believe in coffee.

I believe that Jesus meant it when he said we should love our neighbors as ourselves.

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Um, it turns out I can't really write a true list of where I stand on the issues because it just makes me cranky. Like, why do I even have to say this stuff when it's so obvious? Education is important, so is the environment, so is food safety, so are basic human rights. Just... quit being stupid, politicians, okay?

And seriously: Quit calling me.