Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Let's hear it for navy blue

I tell you what, you haven't lived until you've been afflicted with pink eye at a Very Advanced Age (aka 40). I've missed the last two days of work because of goopy gloppy eyes, and, quite frankly, I'm going a little stir crazy over here.

So yesterday I went to the doctor because I had HAD it. My ears itch, my throat hurts, I have a cough, my sinus' are congested, and my eyes, obviously, are pink. Also, my thumb has a scratch and my skin is dry and I can't find any Chapstick. I mean, come on! There are limits, people!

My beloved doctor doesn't work on Tuesdays, so I saw this other character. Who was actually pretty cool. But he did NOT give me antibiotics, which I was hoping to score. Um, because whatever this is is viral and antibiotics won't help.

Be sicker next time, he joked when I booed his diagnosis, and I was all, I thought I was! Then he was all, cough syrup with a DM in the title, the drops you're putting in your eye aren't helping, and take 3000 milligrams of vitamin C daily.

So that was a waste of a $20 copay is what I'm saying.

But he did give me a note saying I am not contagious and can go to work, with the warning that before I help anyone at the front desk I need to load up on the hand sanitizer.

I thought I wasn't contagious? I'm an English major, though, which is probably why I don't understand the finer points of medicine.

My husband and my mother were NOT impressed. I won't lie, I kind of got in trouble for failing to procure Big Medicine. When I woke up with morning with my left eye all crusty, Eric was like, FORGET the doctor, go get the drops. He's very bossy, that one.

Wait, here's what we're dealing with:

Better, right? But still pink. And wow, I am BRAVE posting pics without make-up, so give me props right now.

Well, anyway. I'm going to be rocking sunglasses all day long, who cares if it's rainy and so dark it's practically twilight at 9 a.m., because A) Abby has an awards ceremony today--she won an essay contest--and B) Chris the Office Manager says that since I have a note, it's fine to go to work, goopy eyes or no. Notes are handy that way.

Oh, the sunglasses? I'm just sensitive to light, I will say if anyone ventures to ask (which I doubt they will--it's my ugly shirt theory: Everyone is so worried about their own ugly shirt that they don't even notice yours) because that will be less humiliating than admitting I have pink eye. Abby votes I just pretend to be blind, but that seems like a big commitment.

Blerg! When's spring? (Oh, right...)

No comments: